8 Ways to Get a Drink at Stampede this year (or any bar)

Stampede is just around the corner folks! Here are some sure fire tips to ensure that you don't go thirsty and find yourself with an empty trough!

1. JUST THE TIP: Pretty standard! Throw a $20 bill (it's Stampede remember) in the tip jar...damn sure the next time I see ya lurking round my bar I'll pick you out of the crowd like a lucky kid at a MIchael Bublé concert!
   
   NOTE: Treat that tip jar like a parking meter...sooner or later that $20 will expire and you will have to feed the meter again!

A Word From The 30 Year Old Bartender

Once upon a time when Mark Zuckerberg was in his dorm room stealing my idea (not really but if I had a hot tub time machine…you can be damn sure that you’d be reading this little rant on LeifBook!) I heard a song by a couple of PETA supporters named Big & Rich bout saving horses and riding cowboys. Being newly single I thought to myself “Hey, that sounds awesome…I wanna save horses!” so I picked up a bar blade, a black felt hat and went got myself a job at the local country saloon! I had to start from the bottom now I’m not…like Drake! I was a barkeeps assistant…also known as the bartender’s little…umm…helper! It wasn’t a bad gig…I got to stock the bar, chill in the liquor room (literally…it was cold) and help the pretty bartenders out with math! I was a computer scientist in training and they were…well…“pretty”! I would Rain Man drink prices for them! Just blackout and BOOM…$11.50…complex calculations like that!